I hesitate to say I'm not happy because I am in the grand scheme of things, but in the little things I've been kind of blech lately, and that feels unhappy. I just feel off. Actually, I feel like I've been some sort of off this entire year. Some of it was warranted, sure, but I'm done feeling off. I also know I am only going to get worse as the weather gets colder and I don't want to get any worse than I am right now. I'm going to make an effort over the next few weeks and months to get happy again.
Short term (over the next few weeks)
- Get back into the gym/exercise in general. I'm embarrassed to say how long it's been since I've been to the gym, or even exercised at all besides running with my friend some Sundays.
- Focus on finances. I've let them get out of control and it's stressing me out.
- Clean, declutter and organise the house. Mainly the living room and the spare room. They have both become a mess holding random kitchen stuff and it stresses me out seeing all that clutter and mess, especially when I know I am the reason it's not being organised or cleaned.
- Install secret drawers. Ikea has these drawers inside of drawers that I wasn't really fussed with when we saw them originally, but now our kitchen is done enough that we are using it, there is a lot of space between the bottom of the drawer and the top, plenty of room for another drawer in some of them. This blog has a picture of them if you want to see what I'm talking about (under #10). I am surprisingly really excited about them, but they've been sitting in the living room for almost 2 weeks.
- Practice positivity and gratitude intentionally. A couple of times a week, write something I am grateful for or something good that happened that day.
- Get to bed earlier and stop taking melatonin. I've been taking melatonin lately and I love/hate it. I need to stop. I've been staying up past midnight most nights, either watching TV or reading, then I take a melatonin and it knocks me out, I barely get up at 7:30 and I'm tired for the first couple of hours. I skip the gym because I'm too tired, I skip breakfast and end up snacking, I am lazy when I get home until I get energy to watch TV or read, then the cycle starts all over again. Not healthy.
- Get more steps daily. Not necessarily 10,000, but I do need to stop sitting down so much.
- Spend a little bit of time outside before it gets too cold. I am not an outside person, the only time I spend outside is when I run with my friend or mow the lawn. I know being outside makes me feel better (as long as it's not too much) and I know I will miss it when it gets too cold.
- Make a bit more effort with my appearance daily. I got my hair cut short enough to avoid putting it in a bun and I'm still putting it in a bun with a lot of bobby pins and hairspray. I wear the same clothes over and over, I have a closet full of clothes I don't wear. I used to wear dresses and skirts to work all the time. I'm not trying to become someone I'm not, but when I put in an effort, I feel better.
Less short term (for the rest of the year)
- Focus on finances. This is on both because I need to get it under control, then I need to do more than that. Stop mindless spending, pay things off early, save more.
- Clear out the sunroom. It's a complete mess from the kitchen renovations - boxes and sawdust. I just want to clean it right now, then I'll figure out what we are actually going to do with it, furniture wise.
- Take stuff back to Ikea. We have a bunch of extra stuff or things we didn't end up using, we can get money back. I love the drive and walking around Ikea, KC doesn't though, I would go by myself if I could carry everything we are returning back into the store. But I will need his help so he'll have to get over it and let me walk around the store.
- Finish the kitchen. It's mainly little things like toekicks and the back of our little peninsula.
- Try to go outside once a week on my own. As it gets even colder it's going to get even harder for me to go outside unless it will be running with my friend. I need to get over it. I can run on my own, I have winter running clothes. I can go for walks or even.. I don't know. What do people do outside in the winter? Besides like winter sports, that's not happening here.
- Write blog posts I've been meaning to write. Our trip to Australia and New Zealand and kitchen posts mainly.
- Do a couple of things in Louisville. This is going to sound dramatic, but I feel like I just exist here, I don't live in Louisville. I go to work and spend time with my friend and KC. I spend a lot of time at home. We go out to eat at the same places. Louisville is no Sydney but I still don't really feel like I belong here or know this city. There are things to do and I want to do them.
- Let go of negative feelings about people in my life. I don't hold grudges really well, I hold them inside my head and get all bitter, but the other person doesn't know. I either need to tell them they pissed me off or hurt my feelings, or just let it go.
- Reach out to people at home. Goes hand in hand with the above, people at home might not have put the effort in with me, but can I say I did all I could do to put in the effort? We shouldn't waste time on people who don't care about us, but have I shown them I care, or are they thinking the I don't?
- Relax and stop stressing about things I can't control. Of course, easier said than done, but stressing over something I can't control and constantly looking and torturing myself every month over something I can't magically make happen - I need to stop. Just stop, relax and worry about it in a few months when it's actually a problem.
- Try 3 new things by the end of the year.
These aren't exactly goals, more like a plan. Not going to hold myself to them if I miss one or all of them, but I need to make an effort and that starts with a plan. I don't really have any pictures to go with this post, so here's a picture of Millie in her favourite place - a box.
But seriously, what do people do outside in winter? That's not me trying to be funny, but really asking. What is something you do outside in the winter?
