I haven't run a half marathon since March 2015. I didn't really have high hopes for this one, I just knew I wouldn't die and I was fine with that. I have not given up on my sub 2 hour half marathon goal, it is just not the most important thing to me right now.
2012: Best half marathon so far. Kentucky Derby Mini Marathon. Time: 2:04:48.
2012: First off, biggest thing - I was blonde! I was also about 20lbs lighter. I lived with my friend, KC and I had just gotten back together (kind of) less than a month before. I didn't like myself very much. I was always calling myself fat, or berating myself for being such a slow runner. I would get down on myself and rely on others to pull me out of my funks. I used a $10 watch from target that was basically a stopwatch. I worked at my friend's dad's restaurant and I enjoyed it, but only because I thought it was just for a year. I got into a few squabbles with the manager because our personalities clashed and I was such a delicate duckling. I didn't know if KC would be at the finish line, or if we would even last the year. I didn't have any cats (in the same country)!
2016: Not best, but probably mentally the best. Kentucky Derby Mini Marathon. Time: 2:32:12
2016: Obviously, not blonde anymore. I recently shed 5lbs but I am still heavier than younger me, but I am so much lighter mentally and emotionally. I'm not as focused on my weight but more on my health. That friend is now one of my top 5 people in the entire world, and we still run together even though we don't live together. This time, I didn't expect KC to be at the finish line (he dropped me off, went to the gym and was going to meet me at the runners reunite spot) but he snuck back in to see me cross the finish line.... and he didn't see me. Ha. But relationship wise, KC & I are married with 3
I am bigger than when I thought I was fat, slower than when I thought I was slow. But I am so much happier. I don't hate myself - I know I say this a lot, but for someone who actively disliked herself from age 12 or so to 25 or so, this is a huge, huge thing. Part of me can't even comprehend how much I used to hate myself, the other part is so proud of how far I've come.
Apparently I was just kidding about the sticking out of the tongue. Why do I do that?
I might not have beat my personal best half marathon wise, I didn't set any running records. But would I go back to 2012 and be that person? Hard no, friends. Hard no. Realising that and loving who I am and where I am, that right there is a personal best.
Linking up with Alyssa and Tracy.
But just for fun,
I beat every race except 2012, which is totally fine by me. Then I ate lots of food, which is also fine by me.