Friday, April 29, 2016

5 Favourites

It's been quite a week, let me tell you. Sometimes I wish I could just have a day or two to myself where I didn't have to do anything. Oh wait that's called a weekend... I have some plans this weekend but for the most part I'm gonna get real friendly with my couch.

But until then...

Time for a Lily!

With Oaks & Derby a week away and the official 'you have the day off' from my boss, I'm getting excited about all the lily drinks I'm gonna drink.

According to the Derby website, an Oaks Lily contains vodka + cosmopolitan mix. It's delicious y'all. And pink!

Rent The Runway

I decided against wearing my lace dress from golden tote. It's pretty and all, but a wee bit too tight to walk around all day in, and I'd be pulling it down all day - that's no fun. What can I say, my hips don't lie. It would be fine for dinner or whatever, and I do love it, just not for all day. I ended up using my birthday freebie from Rent the Runway for a hot pink dress that I don't want to share yet in case it doesn't work out, but in the mean time, I wish I had parties, weddings, showers, whatever-ers to wear all of these dresses:

one / two / three / four

Favourite Jam

Confident - Demi Lovato. I rarely listen to the radio but this song came on the other day and I just love the beat.

Current beauty love

Last month I told you I went a bit nutty with the beauty purchases, and one of those purchases was the LA Girl BB Cream - Tati (and a bunch of other youtubers) talked about it. Way back in the day I used to use this tinted moisturiser by maybelline that they of course discontinued, I bought a bunch of it when I found that out and that was like 8 years ago and I shit you not I still have some. But I've been looking for a replacement, and I think I have found it.

What I loved about the maybelline stuff was that it covered most of my imperfections but not who I was - you could still see my flaws, they were just a little blurred, which is how I like my everyday makeup to look. It was light and went on great. I have tried so many and they are all either too heavy, not enough or too much coverage, too expensive, too whatever. I just haven't found that perfect replacement. Until now! It's a little shy from meeting the mark on coverage, I do have to wear concealer under my eyes (or that could just be because I'm not 21 anymore, right?) but other than that, I love it. You can still see 'flaws' but I at least look awake and a little smoothed out.

Oh and did I mention it is $5? It's like $7 on their website, but at walgreens and it is only $5. The only problem is that at walgreens and drugstore, they don't have all the shades. I bought both fair and light/medium because I wasn't sure, and I have been wearing the fair the entire time, haven't even touched the other one. Maybe it will be good for the summer.

Anyway, pictures? If you follow me on snapchat you've already seen these, sorry for the double up.

Hashtag no filter. Anyway, I am not kidding, I love this stuff.

Cake! Discipline.

Okay so it's not really a favourite, but it's not a non favourite either. I 'failed' my no sweets thing! But I'm not mad or sad. Yesterday, we had this big lunch at work, and there was cake. I felt like a piece. I had a piece. It was good. I did not want another. I successfully said no to the bag of chips that were next to the cake, but I felt like I could eat a piece of cake like an adult and move on. It broke my no sweets month, but 27 days is still impressive. I am more impressed by my ability to have one piece of cake and NOT turn around and eat everything in sight. Am I ready to do that whole 'moderation' thing? Absolutely not, unfortunately. I still do not have the willpower or discipline to have a bag of chips at home and not eat the entire thing. But this shows that I will get there, so high fives.

and with that, I say good friday y'all and have a good weekend.

Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Checking in with my eating

Last month I talked about how I struggle with eating, and a lot of people blew my mind with their thoughts and whatnot, so I decided to do a no sweets thing in April. I also wanted to not eat out on my own and I really wanted to go a month without shopping.

I know it's not the end of the month, but I wanted to check in. I ate out on my own twice. I shopped - I bought some t-shirts and a book. But. I did not eat any junk (my definition of junk for this little challenge).

I think a lot of things I struggle with are way more mental than anything. I don't need bad food, I just want it. It tastes good and then it makes me feel like crap.

I have a lot of food issues that I need to work on - portion sizes, bad food in general, eating to live rather than living to eat.. But my main #1 issue has always been binge eating, and in turn, junk food, because that is what I binge on. Potato chips, chocolate, jelly beans, ice cream, gummi bears, one of those family size pies, etc etc. I would grab a milkshake and an ice cream from mcdonalds and finish them both before I got home and ate dinner. Obviously that is not healthy.

I was successful at tricking myself into working out consistently, I finally feel like I can take a day or two off now and get right back at it, whereas before I would take 2-3 weeks off just because I missed a Monday. But I couldn't quite figure out how to 'trick' myself into eating well, until I started thinking about it as discipline rather than motivation or willpower (thanks Alyssa!).

Like I said, I have other things I need to work on, but the sweets/snack foods are my #1 downfall so I am super proud to say that I have gone 26 days with no chips*, no chocolate, no candy, no ice cream, no milkshakes.. nothing. I didn't eat perfectly, not at all - I had pizza and fries and even pancakes. But if I tried to give up everything and restrict everything, I would have failed miserably and comforted myself with everything I have listed above. Baby steps.

*Unforunately, we went to Jason's Deli last Saturday and I forgot about the chips that would come with my sandwich. I started eating them before I realised, and when I freaked out, KC said it was fine because what I am trying to get away from is eating an entire family size bag of chips while I'm sitting on the couch, which has happened multiple times. I ate my sandwich and then had like 10 chips, and I actually walked away from chips on my plate I don't even know who I am right now. So does this count?

I am not joking or exaggerating when I say that I do not think I have ever gone this long without any of those foods. My entire life. Even when I was sick, I ate chips and then would puke them back up (tmi?). I have never gone a week without just one chocolate or just one handful of chips. I almost caved a few times, but each time when I decided to stay strong, I felt so stupidly proud of myself I wanted to cry. I know that's lame but seriously. 29 years and I have never gone more than a week without chocolate, chips or candy.

Sometimes I am worried people will think I am cocky, or bragging. But that's not fair to myself. I am working hard and I am proud of it. I have been on the other end of the spectrum and I don't want to be there anymore. I'm proud of every step I've taken, no matter how small, or what people think of me talking about it.

I lost a little bit of weight, which is always encouraging, especially when you're working hard and have a cruise coming up. I didn't lose a ton because I still ate a few bad foods. But strengthening my mental muscle and being able to say no to doughnuts when they are just sitting in the kitchen (rude) is so much more important to me than what the scale says. You might think, who cares, have a doughnut. But I can 100% guarantee you that I would not have just one doughnut. I'd have at least 2, and then I would eat bad for lunch and pick up something crappy for dinner, and of course a dessert. It starts a binge for me, and that's what I am working on getting away from.

I am definitely a little scared to try and introduce moderation right now, I think I am going to try and keep going until the cruise where I plan to eat all the things and screw anything resembling moderation. But as for May... I think I might try and work on the bad foods I allowed in April, like pizza, fries, burgers etc.

Linking up with Alyssa and Tracy.


I have a half marathon on Saturday, and I'll be real. I'll probably pig out afterwards because if you can't pig out after running 13 miles, when can you?

Monday, April 25, 2016

Golden Tote Review

I was gifted a tote from Golden Tote for review, but as usual, all opinions are all mine.

Have you guys heard of Golden Tote before? I had heard of them, mainly because of a few reviews I'd seen from other bloggers, but I didn't really understand it. When they contacted me and asked if I'd be interested in receiving a tote, I had to ask for them to explain it in detail.

Basically, Golden Tote is a subscription type service with a twist - you actually choose an item (or two!). They surprise you with the rest! For anyone who has ever wanted something specific from another service and not received it no matter how much they begged.. this is amazing to me.

The other big difference is that you pay for the tote and its items up front. Which can be a bit of a sticker shock.

Basically, on the first Monday of the month, the 'sale' opens for the month. The more popular items disappear pretty quickly. You choose one or two items you love and they surprise you with the rest, after you've filled out your style profile. You can also add on extra items if you just happen to not be able to live without something. I understand, I've been there. Also, you can buy things on their own, it's just better value to do the tote.

If you see something that says final sale, that means you can't return it (which I'm sure you gathered, but wanted to share because that dress is $15!).

Um, is it too early to be thinking about Christmas sweaters? It's only $20 and so cute!

Sorry, got distracted...

What I love about Golden Tote as opposed to other services is that I know how much I have to pay up front. There is no surprise $150 dress that I might fall in love with and sob when I send it back because I can't afford it. Hmm, one $150 dress vs one $149 tote with 6 items... I'm not the best at math but that definitely seems like a no brainer.

So what happens if you receive your tote and you don't absolutely love everything? Don't worry, you can return the items, thank goodness. I love to shop, but I don't ever like to feel like I'm being duped or wasting my money, so a return policy is one of the first things I check out when shopping online (along with shipping, which by the by is free for orders over $149). Previously, Golden Tote was all or nothing - meaning if you wanted a refund, you had to return your entire tote. Which kinda sucks if you loved one item but not the rest. There is a facebook trading group though, which is awesome.

This is the card I received with my tote:

For customers of the May sale, single returns will be available. This is super appealing to me because it's like an album - look, I love Taylor Swift and Adele as much as the next girl but there is always at least one song that's just not your jam, right?

Anyway. So returns, shipping, cost, we've covered it all. Shall we get to the fun part?

Here are the two items I chose:
Esley Lovely Lace Dress / Peppermint In Full Bloom Shift Dress (I think I snagged the last one).

After you've picked the item/s, you fill out a style profile - things like height, weight, body type, bra size, how you like things to fit, etc etc. You can include parts of your body that you don't want to show off, or styles you don't want to receive.

After filling out your style profile and completing the checkout process, all you have to do is wait until the pretty tote ends up on your doorstep! Speaking of the actual tote, the design changes monthly and I've been using it as a gym bag for the past week because my last one was falling apart, and I've already had a few compliments, and no-one said anything about my previous bag (gone with the wind from barnes & noble, come on!). I love tote bags but I love them more when they are actually useful and good quality, which this one absolutely is.

So, enough chatter - shall I show you what I received?

Gilli navy & multicolour striped dress
When I pulled this out of the tote, my first thoughts were 'well this will be too short'. I was so pleasantly surprised when I tried it on, I think it is super adorable and so summery, not to mention the perfect length. I know I will wear this a ton. It's perfect to just grab and throw on to run errands vs sweats and ugg boots (I know, I know, the horror!).

Gilli black & white striped dress
When I first pulled this dress out of the tote, I was so excited. I know midi lengths aren't everyones jam, but when you're somewhat tall, you don't actually get to enjoy midi that much (unless you buy any average length maxi dress... sigh). I also loved that it looked super casual but still cute. When I put it on and did my first impressions on snapchat, I wasn't sure about the stripes so obviously not matching up - however, after wearing it all day last Saturday, I've changed my mind. It really is super cute and comfy, and this is another dress that I can just grab, throw on and look put together.

Naked Zebra mint tee
I love the crossover detail thing at the top of this tee, and I love how soft it is, I love the colour.. but it is too short for me to feel comfortable wearing it without a long cami underneath, and it would be visible, which I don't like. Long torso problems. I got the bright idea to try it with a skirt for work, and I really dig it.

She & Sky green tank
I love the colour, the print, the detail... I just don't love the style. I am not a fan of big blowsy tops like this. This is definitely a problem with subscription box type things, because I actually said I like flowy tops, which I do.. Just not this flowy. Ha. I'm so hard to please. I walked out in this and KC said 'that's my favourite outfit yet' which might have made me like it a bit more. I can actually see myself throwing this on with a pair of shorts, and it would be great for the cruise. As long as the wind stays away. I just wish it were a wee bit longer!

Now for my two favourite items, coincidentally the items I 'chose'...

Peppermint In Full Bloom Shift Dress
When I first started looking at Golden Tote's items, this wasn't there. When I went to place my order, it was there and kicked the other item I was considering to the curb. Sometimes you just know when you're gonna love something. I am normally a medium, they only had a large, but because it was a shift, I figured it would work. I think a medium would have been too short.

Not gonna lie you guys, that shift makes me feel like Kate Middleton.

Esley Lace Dress
Hello my pretty. As soon as I saw this online I was like yup, mine. My pretty. I had planned to wear another dress to Oaks (the day before Derby) but then I got this and it was love at first lace. What do you think? I have strict no heels rules at Oaks/Derby, but I don't think this dress would look as cute with flats...

The one thing I want to know when I see other people post about things they received is this: would you buy it yourself, would you spend your hard earned money on it - because if you wouldn't, I just don't believe you.. you know? So the answer for me with Golden Tote is absolutely. $149 is a lot of money, but 6 items, that is about $25 per item. If you have seen any of my shopping posts, you can probably gather I spend more than that, I just spread it around. The only way I could do the $149 tote is if I spread it out and was very well behaved in other shopping areas. However, I would totally do the $49 tote, and I'll be hopping online the first Monday of May to see if there is anything I simply must have, so stay tuned!

Thank you to Golden Tote for sponsoring this post! All opinions are mine. 

So what do you think of the items I received?

Friday, April 22, 2016

I Believe

I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands
I believe that junk food tastes so good because it's bad for you

I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do

I believe that beauty magazines promote low self-esteem
I believe I'm loved when I'm completely by myself alone

I believe you can't control or choose your sexuality
I believe that trust is more important than monogamy
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul

I believe that family is worth more than money or gold

I believe the struggle for financial freedom is unfair
I believe the only ones who disagree are millionaires
I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness
I believe that wedded bliss negates the need to be undressed

I believe that god does not endorse TV evangelists
I believe in love surviving death into eternity
I believe in karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned

I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

In case you didn't recognise it or have not heard it, these are the lyrics to a Savage Garden song called AffirmationI have loved this song since it came out, way back in 1999. This song is my jam, and if you haven't seen the video you should totally do that now because it's awesome (and so 90s).

There is only one line in this song that I straight up don't agree with, and another I am ambivalent about. All the others I feel like are my life motto or something. 

How bout you, do you agree with most of the lines in this song, or do you disagree with the majority of them?

Thursday, April 21, 2016

Guest Posting at Pinky's!

Hey all! Today I'm guest posting over at Pinky's while she's off on a fabulous holiday (so jealous!).

Now, we all know how much I love to plan and talk about travel, especially packing, so today I'm sharing (another) simple carry on packing list. Kind of like a base, and then you can add your accessories or flair, if you will. I don't have flair, I like neutrals and stripes, ha!

Check it out here!

Tuesday, April 19, 2016

How I rate books on Goodreads

Christy posted about how she rated books on goodreads and it made me think about how I do it. Honestly, my rating system is so weird, there is no system really, and 2 books that are rated the same could have complete opposite feelings, if that makes sense. It probably doesn't, which is why my rating system makes no sense. If you listen to The Armchair Librarians podcast (which you should) they talk about it as well and basically everything they said is how I feel.

But I thought I'd give explaining it a go, and I thought including books with those ratings would help with the explanation (it will probably make it more of a mess).

DNF / Abandoned

I rarely give up on books. I know, I know. Life is too short for bad books. But unless something pisses me off from the first page, or it's super long and I just can't get into it, or the ebook formatting is super weird and I legit can't make sense of it, I will keep going. Mainly because I just hope it will get better. It rarely does.

Here are a few books I've abandoned over the past couple of years:

The Best of Me - I remember trying so hard to get into this, I bought it when it first came out (2011) and good lord it was boring. I just couldn't get into it. I enjoyed a few Sparks books when I was younger but they aren't my jam anymore. I'm happy to watch the movies when I want a good cry, but that's it.

World War Z I know you probably won't believe this, but for the first half of 2013, I didn't read. At all. I was stressed about the wedding. I finally decided to try and get back into it because something was missing, you know? I got halfway through this book before deciding I wasn't fan and switched to Pride & Prejudice, which I probably should have just started with!

The Dressmaker - I got this from netgalley, I think, and the formatting was horrendous. I don't care if it's not pretty, but the sentences were all over the place with the third sentence being in front of what should be the first sentence etc etc. Mum said the movie was good though, so I might give that a go.

A Game of Thrones - I know, can you believe it? I just couldn't with this book. KC loves this series, I don't mind the TV show but I couldn't get into the book. I got about halfway through, but the reason I gave up was because of the ridiculously long split narratives. I don't mind split narratives, but they took too long to get back to the other people.

Bleak Seasons this is the 6th book in The Black Company series, which is KC's favourite of ALL time. Like, you think I re-read P&P a lot? You should see how many times he re-reads this series. It's ridiculous. I kind of enjoyed the first few, but then KC told me there was no happy ending and I like romance, gosh darn it, plus then KC and I broke up so I was like bye Felicia.

1 Star

You'd think because I rarely gave up on books, there would be more 1 star books, but I only have 5 over the last few years, and 2 of them were so long ago that I don't actually remember why I disliked them so much. But for the most part, 1 star means I hated it (why do I finish things I hate?), or I couldn't find a single thing about the book that I liked or didn't make me angry.

For the most part, I am pretty good at judging a book by its cover in the sense that I know when a book is not for me, so I don't read them. But sometimes, they slip through the cracks.

Here are the 3 that I remembered:

The Sisters of Versailles - Hated this one. It was boring, badly written and very hard to get through.

Longbourn - Ooh this one made me MAD. I was so excited to see a P&P variation in the airports and bookstores, maybe this would make people interested in the P&P world and then everyone would love P&P and we'd all live happily ever after? NO.

Station Eleven - Gah. This book made me hate reading. I tried so hard. As I mentioned above, I am pretty good about judging whether I will absolutely hate a book and staying away, but this one slipped through. It didn't sound like my kind of book, but I read it anyway and I couldn't tell you a single thing about it now because it all went in one ear and out the other. Nopeity nope nope.

2 Stars

Hmm. Looking back on my goodreads, I seem to have a pattern with rating books 2 stars and that is expectations. I had certain expectations based on other reviews, hype, the cover, synopsis or previous books. Also, sometimes I think a different me in a different time would have liked it. But either way, I think the recurring theme was that I was disappointed in it.

The Maze Runner - this was one of the times that I think a (much) younger me would have liked it, but I was indifferent. It was just too simple for me.

We Were Liars - everyone went crazy for this so my expectations were high. Not only did it not meet my expectations, I didn't care for the story or the characters.

The Summer I Turned Pretty series - again, high expectations. I'm mad at myself for reading the whole series and disliking all of them. The main character was stupid and whiny. Hated.

Allegiant - stupid ending to a stupid book in a somewhat okay trilogy.

Dead Ever After - stupid, insulting ending to a series that I enjoyed immensely until this stupid book. I want to read her other series, but I swear, I am still scarred by this one.

All's Fair in Love & Cupcakes - this book annoyed me because I feel like I was tricked. It sounded adorable and cute but there were things about it that weren't mentioned in the synopsis, so that made me cranky.

Spelled - Cute cover, right? It was much, much too young, and I think a much younger me would have liked it okay.

The Brontë Plot - pretty cover, fabulous title, synopsis sounded great. I have learned that Katherine Reay and I are just destined to not like each other, and I will not read another of her books. They have so much promise in my eyes, but they do not meet what they could be, and they are dragged down by absolute shit that she insists on including in her books, and some people like that shit but I am not one of them.

3 Stars

I rate a lot of books 3 stars. A lot. There is no real rhyme or reason to it. Sometimes it was just 'eh' okay, but I feel bad rating it 2 stars. Sometimes I'm just indifferent to the book as a whole. Sometimes it is in comparison to similar books. Sometimes I can't look past the flaws, though I did enjoy reading it. Sometimes there was a hint of good but there was too much bad and it overshadowed it. But overall, it basically just means this was good, passed the time fine and I'm not mad I read it.

Landline - I definitely did not hate this, but compared to Rainbow's other books, I just didn't love it as much. It was cute and I liked it, but I was pretty indifferent to it overall.

The Closer You Come - There were a few things about this book that really bugged me, a conflict at the beginning and the characters names, but I didn't hate it.

Pride, Prejudice & Cheese Grits - I wanted to love this, of course. But there were a few things in this book that I hate and can never get over, even though it's totally not the authors fault, it's something I am prejudiced against (haha get it) but whatever.

The Cuckoo's Calling - I definitely had higher expectations for this book but overall it was just long and boring. When I don't care to read the other books in a series, that says something because I am worse than a cat with my curiosity sometimes. Just shows I am indifferent to it.

Orphan Train - I remember this book took a long time to get into, and right when it started to get interesting, it ended. I was never fully invested in it, so eh.

Blackmoore - I loved Edenbrooke by the same author, but this one fell flat. The story, the character, big fat 'meh'.

The 5th Wave - I didn't have enough feelings towards this book. I was kinda eh, but like I said above, it says something when I don't want to read the other books in a series, and I am actually listening to the second book as I type this (not as I type it, but like it is the book I am currently listening to) so I clearly felt a little bit more than The Cuckoo's Calling. For this one, I was intrigued enough to keep reading.

Bared to You - Well now. This book is not normally something I'd read and I just didn't feel anything towards it, but if someone who hated classics picked up a classic, I'd think it was unfair of them to rate it 2 stars, so that's how I felt towards this book. Why read something you don't think you'd like normally? I didn't hate it, and if people like these kinds of books, they might like it. It just didn't do anything for me.

Where She Went - I read this book straight after the first one, which I really enjoyed, and it didn't compare at all. In fact, I disliked it so much that it tainted If I Stay for me. I ended up not hating the ending, but the whole feel of the 2nd book was just blah.

Night Circus - I cannot believe I rated this 3 stars! I HATED this book. I'm changing my rating. I still remember how much I hated this book. Also, I listened to it, and I despise Jim Dale (but everyone else loves him).

4 Stars

This is where it gets super murky for me. 4 stars feels to me like they are books I really enjoyed but didn't love love love. Sometimes they are books I liked well enough but the flaws bugged me. Sometimes they are books I loved but I feel silly giving them 5 stars. Sometimes I don't make sense.

Twilight - omg she likes twilight, how dare she. Yeah I like it, what of it? Honestly, I LOVED these books when they came out. It was before goodreads and before I was influenced by what other people think. Back then, I would have rated them 5 stars for sure. But now, many years and several better books later, I can recognise their flaws and why other people dislike them so vehemently, but I am no literary critic and gosh darn it I like them, okay?

First & Then - this book was super cute. I enjoyed it. Not enough for 5 stars, but it gave me all the warm and fuzzies which is what I want out of a book, so I am not sure why.

Life of Pi - I really don't know why this is only 4 stars. This book blew my mind like no other book has done before, back when I read it several years ago. I do remember finding it very boring whilst reading it and my friend who lent it to me was all 'just wait' and I was all 'blah' but then I kept reading and yeah. Mind blown. It does kind of lose it's magic afterwards and it's not something I would re-read, kind of like watching the sixth sense the second time around. Bruce, you're dead. That's not a spoiler by the way.

One Plus One - Why is this only 4 stars? Upgrading to 5 stars because I loved it, and I still love it when I think about it, and I read it well over a year ago.

Maid for Love - This book was all sorts of dorky and romantic and lame and sexy and cheesy but it was the right part of all of those and I loved it. I think I felt silly giving it 5 stars, hence the 4, but I really did enjoy it.

Fantasy Lover - Yeah this book is exactly how it looks and sounds, but again, I loved it. I think she is a really funny writer and I do quite enjoy her books. But again, I feel silly giving something like this 5 stars even though I've read this one twice, so clearly I enjoyed it.

On the Island - Read this in one sitting and I loved it. But something was missing, I am not sure what. I hate when that happens. I did enjoy it and absolutely recommend it.

Code Name Verity - I LOVED the first half of this book, the second half wasn't as strong, and sprinkled all over were very boring parts. But overall I loved the story and the message, but I don't know if I'd recommend it. What's up with that?

Handle with Care - jeepers, why is this 4 stars? This book wrecked me. When I want to talk about a sad book (for whatever reason) this is the one that I bring up, all the time. I just told my friend about it the other day, actually, and I told her the ending and gah. It literally broke my heart. Okay not literally. So why no 5 stars? I don't know.

Eligible - this book was lame and dorky and had some issues. But the P&P lover in me loved it. It's hard to separate P&P and whatever I am reading sometimes.. no-one can be Jane, and I am not a purist, so I can enjoy them for what they are, most of the time (unless they are horrible, cough, Longbourn, cough). It definitely did have flaws that I didn't love, hence the no 5 stars.

Sharp Objects - this was one that I read, could see the good writing and I couldn't put it down, but it is not my kind of book. I would never read it again but I can see that it's a good book. I don't want to drag down the average rating by giving it how I probably really felt about it - 3 stars. Not that the average matters. But does that make sense? It's like someone who hates classics, it's not fair that they read a classic, hate it and give it 1 star. Don't read what you don't like. I didn't hate this one, but it didn't give me warm and fuzzies.

Of Beast & Beauty - this book was super cute. I loved it. It was definitely lame and cheesy though, so I probably felt silly giving it 5 stars.

The Handmaid's Tale - I probably had super high expectations for this one, and I can see why others love it, and I think that might have influenced my rating, which I hate, but what can you do. It's not something I would read again or recommend to most people, but I still think about it often and I did like it. See, I make so much sense!

After You - I loved Me Before You, like everyone else, but I didn't expect another one. It was hard to separate this one from the first, but that's what happens with sequels. I did enjoy it, but not as much as Me Before You.

5 Stars

You'd think 5 stars would be relatively easy - I loved it, end of story. Sometimes. Most of the time.

Angela's Ashes - This book.. man. I recognise it is a good book, the writing was fabulous, it was a wonderful/heartbreaking/beautiful story but you couldn't pay me to read it again. Other 5 star books that I feel the same way about are Unbroken and The Kite Runner.

The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks - goodness gracious this book was boring. I don't know if I gave it 5 stars because I felt like I should, but I am not a non fiction fan. The writing was good and it was interesting, but it was very sciencey and boring, and I am not one for the science. I'd probably rate it 3 or 4 now, but again - why am I reading sciencey non fiction if it's not my cup of tea?

The Sea of Tranquility - Oh this book. So much love and no idea why. I stayed up all night to finish it, and it gives me warm and fuzzies just looking at the cover.

Throne of Glass series - Don't even care. Love this series so much. I will go down with this ship!

Saving Francesca - Not sure why I loved this as much as I did. It was so Australian. It made me feel like I was in a hug. I loved it.

The Lunar Chronicles - Again with the no shame, I loved this series so so so much. Am I 29 or 19? Don't even care.

What Alice Forgot - Again with the so Australian. It's weird. Would I like Australian things if I was there? I just loved this book. I loved the characters and the story. It felt so real to me.

Outlander - I loved this book. I know lots of people don't, but I think people who have issues with suspension of disbelief, or reading things that they don't agree with or wouldn't do, need to stay away from this book. I loved it. Would I go back in time and marry someone else? Nope. Would I allow my husband to beat me if I disobeyed him? Nope. It sounds weird when you say it like that, but I loved it.

Attachments - This book was so cute and warm and fuzzy. I loved it. Simple.

The Book Thief - One of my favourites, I re-read almost every year. I love that I read this before goodreads and the like so that I couldn't dissect it like other people have. Sometimes you just love books and that's okay.

A Little Something Different - This book was totally adorable. I loved it. Probably not worthy of 5 stars, but I don't care.

The Selection series - Again, this series is all sorts of lame and I hated the way the 3rd ended, I wanted more but not the more they gave us in book 4. But anyway. Loved the first 3.

The Giver - On goodreads, this is 5 stars, but in my blog post about it it's 4 stars, and I agree with my blog post (now, I'd probably give it 3). I think I was worried everyone would stone me if I disliked it, but I could take or leave this book and I have no desire to finish the series.

The Martian - Oh look, it's that book I wouldn't shut up about last year. I loved everything about this book. I loved that I didn't expect to like it, I loved the characters and the writing. A lot of people complained about the science and math, but when I read something I don't care about or understand, I don't try and understand it or make myself focus on it - I move on if it's not pertinent, which to me, it wasn't.

The Nightingale - This book was slow and boring in parts but holy dagger to the heart at the end.

The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society - Again, I am glad I read this one before goodreads and the like because I loved it SO much.

The Royal We - I remember I rated this 4 stars and then upped it to 5 because I don't care, I will shout my love for this book from the rooftops. So lame, so cheesy, so me.

The Grand Sophy - SO much love for this book. This is one that I loved with all my heart but wouldn't recommend to anyone but my mother in law because I could bet $100 most people wouldn't love it, but that is okay.

I know this post wasn't super exciting, unless you like to read about books and how people feel about them. Honestly, rating books with 1-5 stars is really hard. Not the hardest thing in the world, but it's weird. Sometimes I can absolutely love a book but recognise it's flaws, so I won't give it 5 stars. Or sometimes I love a book despite its flaws, so I will give it 5 stars. Sometimes it's about how a book made me feel, or if I would re-read the book, or even if I would actually recommend it. Sometimes I enjoyed reading a 4 star book more than a 5 star book and where is the sense in that?

Sometimes I rate books out of personal enjoyment, and sometimes I rate them based on how good a book it actually is (in my opinion, like writing, plot etc). It's hard.

How do you rate your books? Are you nonsensical like me?