Monday, July 20, 2015

If I could turn back time



and you'd stay.....

Who doesn't love Cher? Okay, but if you don't, I don't think we can be friends.

I don't believe everything happens for a reason, but I do believe that the choices I'd made - good and bad - have led me where I am today. I like where I am quite a bit, so given the chance I wouldn't change anything.

However, if I could be guaranteed that nothing would change and I could simply change things for the fun of it.. there's a few things I wouldn't mind changing:

- I would study abroad.

- I'd be more impulsive and spontaneous. I was such a boring teenager. I didn't even go out till I was 21 and the legal drinking age at home is 18. There is nothing wrong with being boring, I guess, I just wish I had done more fun stuff.

- I would tell my own personal Regina George to suck it.


- I'd worry less. If you can't change it, Kristen - get over it.

- I'd start exercising earlier. I wish I had made it a habit when I was a teenager, I feel like that would help in maintaining the habit as an adult.

- I'd enjoy being single. I went from boyfriend to heartache and missing that boyfriend to another boyfriend to.. you get the picture. I was so focused on having someone that I never enjoyed myself.. until right before I met KC. So I had a little bit of time, I just wish I hadn't been so focused on a relationship when I was younger.


- I'd enjoy the hangover free days.

- Not make so many stupid financial decisions. I am smarter now, for sure, but I am fairly stupid financially. I wish I had never gone down that road.

- Had more self confidence. Oh, I was such a little debbie downer. I really believed I was ugly and everyone hated me and it was so hard to act like those things weren't true. Now I'm older, I don't care if people hate me and I don't care if they think I'm ugly.


- I'd do what made me happy, not what I thought I 'should' do.

- I'd live by myself. Don't get me wrong, I love KC and our cats. But I'll never (er.. hopefully) know what it's like to live on my own and do whatever I want all the time.


- I would never read Allegiant and the last 2 Sookie Stackhouse books.

- Most importantly, I would see Cher live. She came to Sydney in 2005 and her shows sold out so quickly, plus tickets would have been more than my (now) mortgage payment, which was more than 18 year old me was making. I have regretted it ever since.


Like I said, I love my life and wouldn't change a thing if it meant I wouldn't end up here. I know I've made some stupid decisions and life could be completely different, so I consider myself extremely lucky that I ended up where I did and I am super thankful for everything in my life. I wouldn't want to insult my life by wishing to change anything about my past!

What would you change if you could?

65 comments:

  1. The exercise one...still struggling with that and wishing I would have made it a habit a LONG time ago! I did see Cher in concert once when I was about 13...don't regret that!

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  2. HAHAHA "I would never read Allegiant". I've forgotten what that book was even about! And yes to working out earlier. I wish I had started that younger too. Darn teenage years of not caring. And I never live by myself either. Sometimes I wish I had!

    <3, Pamela
    Sequins & Sea Breezes

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  3. i gotta admit--it's kind of awesome living alone sometimes! charlie isn't always the best snuggler! ;) my mom in the 80s looked like cher in the 80s--like in the movie Mask. Identical. i agree about accepting yourself more as you get older--wish i'd done that earlier in life! loved reading your answers and finding how many we had that were similar.

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  4. There's def a few things I'd change, but really doing the things I did got me where I am so I'm not too upset about any of it....Although study abroad is one of mine as well

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  5. I would definitely change the exercise one! I wish I hadn't waited so long to get healthy! It's a hard habit to get into when you're use to being in a bad one for so long!

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  6. We continue to be so similar, Kristen. I would definitely study abroad and start exercising sooner if I could turn back time. Love your lists, as always.

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  7. Living alone is one that I wish I'd done. I was never in good enough financial shape to afford it, though. I was also a relationship-hopper, so I'm glad that I had some time to myself, but I probably would have benefited from more. I could list a lot of things I'd undo, but if I erased one mistake, I'd just repeat it again. I usually have to learn the hard way.

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  8. There are so many things I would do differently...I try not to dwell on them because it just makes me sad. It is what it is. I totally love Cher and wish I went to her show when she was here. I heard it was awesome.

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  9. I definitely would have studied abroad!

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  10. Exercising earlier for sure. Or finding a sport that I really enjoy and get good at it, would be mine.

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  11. I would change all those stupid boys I went out with lol - or at least not waste as much time on them lol!! I also agree on the working out and eating right bit! xo, Biana -BlovedBoston

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  12. Yes. All of these. Especially the exercise earlier. While I don't know if that would fix my current state of laziness, at least I would have been a little more ahead of the game !

    And Cher is the queen of all things. Anyone who says differently should be shot.

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  13. I would study abroad too! That is definitely my biggest regret from college. And I would totally write off the "friends" that I knew at the time weren't good for me.

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  14. I'm not big on regretskies and changing things - like you said...I believe every good and bad decision I've ever made has led to me to this moment.

    I do regret not studying abroad and I wish I would have stuck with exercise throughout - not totally abandoned it in my late teens to try to pick it up again in my mid-30s.

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  15. Ah. I can agree with so so many of these...

    and now you got Cher stuck in my head. Haha

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  16. Nope, I did track and cross country my whole life (in addition to dance, cheerleading, ice skating, basketball, soccer, tennis, to name a few) and I hate any form of exercise more than anyone you've ever met. So I don't think having that habit as a kid/teen helped me at all!
    I don't know what I would change, I like most of my life. I like where am I now at least, although maybe I'd do something other than being a lawyer! It's not terrible, but it's not my fave.
    If I could change where I went to jr high, I would. I hated it, threatened to kill myself hated it. My two best friends in the world are from there, but even that's not worth it to me. I'd give them up for different besties if it meant I never had to go to that school.

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  17. isn't it funny how everyone thinks kids are so carefree and light? I was such a nervous wreck of a child/teenager, I would never want to go back to that time! Even though I have to wake up and go to a job and pay bills, I feel way less anxious than I ever did growing up! I'd definitely go back and tell myself to relaaaaax

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  18. I completely agree with you...that the decisions we made in the past make us who we are today. And I agree that while I wouldn't change my life now, there are so many things I would have done differently over the years. Almost all of them have something to do with allowing myself to have more fun, not sweating over stupid shit, not letting certain people treat me like shit and doing more spontaneous fun things. And exercise. I tried hard in college with bouts of being good but nothing ever stuck afterwards.

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  19. I think I would have made more of an effort to be more outgoing and not so serious. Good grades are important, but not nearly as important as I made them. I would have not automatically given respect to people who didn't deserve it. I also would not have read Allegiant. (Thanks for bringing that up, I'm annoyed all over again!) I would have made my life less about boys and more about me.

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  20. I love this. I agree that not everything happens for a reason but everything you do leads you to where life takes you. There are so many of those that I would also change if I knew that it wouldn't alter my life in anyway. I so wish I had studied abroad in college. Not leaving my boyfriend seemed like a better option at the time...even though we were off & on the entire time I was in college... live & learn...

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  21. Love this! I love where I am now too, but if I could change anything it would be how insecure and shy I was as a teenager, I would want to enjoy that time more and not be so self-conscious!

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  22. I would have become a school teacher... no doubt...

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  23. I can relate to so many of these (being single, living by myself, and exercising when I was younger, to name a few...), and I think about this kind of thing a lot but I always figure there must have been a reason I didn't do them, you know? Like for whatever reason I just wasn't in a place when I was younger where I could have handled the things that adult me thinks I should have done. Does that make sense? Like with school, sometimes I wish I had stuck it out in engineering the first time so I didn't have to try it again 10 years late, but I also just don't think I had it in me back then to do that, for whatever reason.

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  24. I agree everything happens as a way to shape us so I don't regret but I do wish I was better about money through my college years. I also wish I stuck to triathlons.

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  25. YES to traveling abroad and exercising earlier! My cousins have been studying abroad, and their adventures are AMAZING! The thought never even crossed my mind back in college *womp womp*.

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  26. I think i just nodded along to your entire list. Especially studying abroad and having more fun and be more financially responsible...and yeah, all of it! :)

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  27. I often think about how I should have enjoyed being single while I was single. All the things I could have done or not done without anyone who cared one way or the other.

    The last two books in the Sookie series were horrible, I didn't even read the very last one for two years and I was sorry when I finally did.

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  28. So fun to read all the life lessons you've learned and things you would change! Like you, I'm happy where I ended up but it would be nice if I could do just a few things differently without changing the overall outcome. Like not developing more of my own hobbies or travelling enough before kids, to name just a couple!

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  29. Fun post, lady! Never reading Allegiant would be on my list too. :) I'm so glad I lived on my own for a few years! It definitely helped me to be more independent. But now I miss the days of a clean toilet and a clean house for that matter. lol.

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  30. Such a great post! I think sometimes too, what I would've done differently. Fun to think about. I love all of your points, I wish I had done the same on a lot of them too.

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  31. Oh gosh, I'd have to repeat a lot of what you said. Made smarter financial decisions, enjoyed being single for a minute, started exercising earlier, etc... Fun post!

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  32. I literally just had this same conversation with my husband last night - I agree with you, I don't think I would actually change anything major since that's why who I am today, but I definitely wish I would've enjoyed being a teenager more than I did. I was "that" kid that focused on school and never really had much fun.

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  33. These are great, and am right there with you on studying abroad, exercise and living alone!

    I used to wish I had stuck with a music major in college, and I kind of still do, but that would have changed my life a LOT and I pretty much like my life now.

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  34. I would also tell all the Regina George's I've known in my life to totally SUCK IT!!!

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  35. Holy smokes, you and I are white and black, night and day! I started partying at 16, was completely financially responsible, lived by myself, studied overseas, was never a mean girl (hated those b's in high school), have always been confident and give zero F's what others think...

    But just like you I did bounce from boyfriend to boyfriend. Ahhh well, you've turned into a fantastic adult! I could mention some colossal mistakes I made as an outgoing party girl... That's a whole other can of worms that us girls on the other end of the spectrum have to deal with. There's truly no right way to do things, just lessons learned as you go!

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  36. Awww man such a cute post! I might have to steal this idea from you. So true about the being single. I haven't been single for more then a few months since the age of 16. I'm now married, but yeah wasted a lot of time on that douche, that asshole, that jerk...

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  37. I would definitely tell my 16 year old self to never cry over anything that happened in High School. 95% of those chicks never even left my hometown and are doing nothing exciting and they were the ones who totally made me cry and think my life was coming to an end. I wish I could tell 16 year old Amanda to not give two shits!

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  38. Not studying abroad is one of my major regrets. I would definitely turn back time and tell my old self to take advantage!

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  39. Definitely studying abroad! And living by myself and being less of a goody two shoes. Mostly I'd try and have more confidence in myself. Just as much in ability as looks - I didn't do a lot of things because I thought I'd suck at them. I should have tried!

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  40. I would have just worked for a while instead of going right to college after high school. My parents expected me to go, so I randomly chose a major that I didn't care about and slacked off. I would have worked and saved more money. I don't regret getting married at 22, nor do I regret going right from my parents' house to my husband's, but I regret not developing a better job history and building up some savings.

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  41. ohhh I am with you!! I wish i would have made exercising a habit when I was younger! I remember my PE teacher in Jr high would always tell us to be grateful for PE because adults have to pay for a gym haha She was right! HAHAHA THAT ZAC EFRON GIF!!!! so freaking funny. and so true, I tend to be a people pleaser and then end up not doing things I actually want to do. I need to speak up more and learn to please myself, too!
    xo, Candace | Lovely Little Rants

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  42. I always wonder if I would have been more active if that would have carried over into my adult life like reading or bad eating habits did, but I'm not sure. I really love living by myself and it's not something I ever thought I would to. I wish I would have experienced dorm living and gone away to college, but then I may not have had the same group of friends and I love them!! I wish I would have applied for scholarships. I didn't have ANY because I didn't want to have to keep my grades up and it's a lot of work to apply for them. So now, I have school loans and I should have busted my ass to get those scholarships and made life easier now.

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  43. These are so true! I agree with basically all of these. Also, the visuals to go with them are great!

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  44. I would totally have done college differently, and taken more advantage of the opportunities to travel and study abroad and such while I was there. I wouldn't change where I went, because that would change way too much about my life (like, I wouldn't have met the person who helped me start running, etc.) but I would have made better use of my time there. And I TOTALLY wish I had been smarter about money when I was younger. I spent a good chunk of time making up for just being point blank uneducated and that had real consequences at the time and later on in my life. Also, cheers to worrying less when you can't do anything about it!

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  45. I would have loved to study abroad as well. As for Cher. Perhaps you can get reasonably priced tickets here in he states sometime. :) XO -Alexandra

    Simply Alexandra: My Favorite Things

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  46. I'm still stuck on the fact I found another person from my generation that loves Cher.

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  47. First, I love Cher, and I've seen Cher in concert, and yes, she was amazing.
    Second, I (try) to live my life with the "no regrets" attitude, but my top choice for what I'd do differently is...drumroll...study abroad. I took years of Spanish, always made top marks, had a stepmother and father willing to pay for me to study abroad, but didn't. Now, I can't speak Spanish and can't say that I lived in Spain.
    Third, I'd never, ever have gotten involved with that person that I got involved with when I was 17, married at 19, divorced at 21. Yes, I learned a lot of lessons, but I wish I'd learned those lessons in a different way.
    Fourth, if that Regina George of yours is still in the Sydney area, give me her address. I'll go tell her to suck it for you.

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  48. So many of these are true for me too (though like you, I'm very happy with where I am and believe that all of my previous choices added up to get me here!). I'm ALWAYS trying to worry less, and I wish I had moved to NYC sooner...but I'm glad to be here now :)

    xoxo B | The Sequin Notebook

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  49. I so wish that I had studied abroad as well, or even just decided to take a year (or half a year) off before or after university to travel... Now that I'm older I feel like I have so many things to pay for and save for. But I've also kind of decided that I need to spend more money on travelling. I used to just be like it's too expensive I can't go, but I want to make it more of a priority to at least go somewhere once or twice a year and save for a big Euro trip. :)

    A lot of these are true for me too... I made some dumb decisions when I was younger and wasted money on stupid things like clothes, etc. Clothes aren't stupid but I spent money that I should have been saving for school and other things.

    "Would never have read Allegiant" LOL ... awww! Fair enough!!

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  50. Oh God, so many things. Mostly financial. And definitely staying in school and graduating "on time". Other than that, I don't really have anything because those 2 alone would have completely changed the course of my life.

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  51. There are so many things that I would like to change that I should probably do a post too.

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  52. Okay so I don't know why you would have never read Allegiant, but if it's because you hated the ending (like me), then I totally get you. I loved those first two books so much... *sigh*

    This was a fun list to read. I feel like I got to know a lot more about you! I definitely hear you on loving where you are in life right now so not regretting the things that brought you here.

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  53. Okay so I don't know why you would have never read Allegiant, but if it's because you hated the ending (like me), then I totally get you. I loved those first two books so much... *sigh*

    This was a fun list to read. I feel like I got to know a lot more about you! I definitely hear you on loving where you are in life right now so not regretting the things that brought you here.

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  54. yes study abroad & YES telling off the childhood Regina Georges of the world. I wish I had my backbone then!

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  55. I used to say that I didn't have any regrets, but that's totally not true. I try not to dwell on them, but they're definitely there. (And, like you, I believe all my decisions led me to this moment ... So I can't hate all those things too terribly much.)

    A few of mine:

    - I would have applied to a few more of the universities I really wanted to go to. I was so afraid I would get my heart broken with a rejection letter that I didn't even try. (And, to be honest, I was also afraid of the cost because the schools I'm talking about are Ivy League and hella expensive.)

    - I would have made better decisions regarding certain guys. Just ... No.

    - I would have made more of an effort to find a job and move to a place I've always wanted to live (like NYC or Seattle). I was always too afraid and played it safe.

    - I also would have studied abroad. I was so focused on getting out of college in 4 years that I didn't consider any opportunities like this. I thought I might fall behind.

    Oh, and the living alone thing can be really great. I'm glad I did it, but it did get a little old after a while. I lived alone from the time I graduated college at 21 until Eric and I decided to take the plunge and move in together in March 2011 (at that point I was 26). I liked having my own space, but it definitely sucks being responsible for literally everything around the house (bills, cleanup, etc.)!

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  56. There's a lot of things I'd like to change, many similar to these but if I had to pick just one thing, it would be to "do what I want, not what I am expected to do/suggested by others to do/ what I think is the done thing to do" - if I could make just one change, that would be it.

    I'm slowly trying to do that know, but I think if I did it earlier in life, it would be much easier to do it now.

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  57. I also went from boyfriend to boyfriend and wish I had stopped and just breathed a little on my own! Something I would change would be... well, that. I wouldn't have dated so many boys. :P

    Jessica
    Pyreflies.org

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  58. I love this post... which is funny because I was just thinking about things like this a couple days ago. I agree with a lot of your points... studying abroad would be awesome. Being smarter about my finances when I was younger is a huge one. And one that's really gotten to me lately is that I wish I would have focused and held onto more friendships from my teen years. I always put the stupid boyfriend first. Dummy me!

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  59. Great post as always! I mean I feel the exact same way! I was such a boring child - I had a bit of a late teenage rebellion phase when I was 19-20 and that only meant I made a few stupid decisions relationships wise (oops dating two guys at once)...I lacked so much confidence and I relied so much of that on other people! Older me realises how kickass I am and I should have been more confident! I guess we learn from our mistakes though, right? And also I definitely wish I'd enjoyed more being single and even gone on to live by myself or with a girlfriend. I don't regret meeting my man now (I feel like the luckiest girl ever) but there are some things I wished I'd done before!xx

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  60. I would have definitely study abroad. Working for a college, that's my biggest regret about college. Cory and I started dating my freshman year of college and I wish that I hadn't let that take over my life. That sounds bad but I never made a lot of friend while in college and sometime I wish I had balanced my relationship and making new friends better.

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  61. "Id do what made me happy not what I thought I should do." Yup!! Overall I feel good about most of my choices but yes, I agree with most of this!

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  62. backpacking after university!! that's one thing i would definitely change but i was too eager to get rid of my student loans (i loathe debt) that i wanted to start working asap to get that shit done.

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  63. i studied abroad in paris for a month but i regret not doing it for a whole semester..and really working on my french. xo jillian - cornflake dreams

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  64. I would definitely worry less as well. I worry about all kinds of things that I can't change. Worst part about it... It makes me act pretty mean toward people that don't even deserve it.

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  65. hahaha yes to never reading Allegiant! I agree with so many of these-- specifically having more self confidence and wishing I hadn't cared about all the Regina's of high school! And I'm still working on the worrying thing!

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