Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Humpday confessions

DO EEET.

I love confessions as much as anyone, but sometimes..


So I thought I would try and be extra crazy today.

When this happens:


I'm like whoa whoa whoa



Then I put my bitch hat on 



And then I put my sneaky bitch hat on


When someone has some sort of issue and drama in their life... It's like, right now, I am sorry but I am too old for this shit. I am so sick of hearing the same shit over and over but you won't do a damn thing about it.


And then because you've asked me my opinion, which I stupidly gave, now it's really super awkward because it's like the elephant in the room that we're all pretending isn't there.


Bad people are bad people and they need to not be in your life. That's all I'm saying, on the internet on the blog that you don't read.


Moving onwards and upwards.

Monday night we went to dinner with friends and no idea how this conversation came about, but KC basically said he's ready for a baby now.

me
After I calmed down, I told him he was not, in fact ready.


And that was the end of that convo.

If I knew someone was lying, I used to just be like, whatever. If they wanna lie, whatever. Now I'm like 'that doesn't sound right, you BIG LYING HOE'.


When I meet new people in real life, I try not to freak them out and try to be all 'normal'.


When I find a potential new bloggy friend I comment on 70 posts and follow them on all social media thingys so they know I like them.


Guess who's leaving for Australia tomorrow?


58 comments:

  1. hahaha well you're totes gonna judge my post girl. haha also yes I hate when people whine about the same shit and do nothing about it. Good grief! Loved the whole sequence about the best friend. It had me rolling!!!

    Last but not least ... Have a great trip girl!!! I know you'll have a blast!

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  2. Have fun in Australia!!!! Lmao that's probably how my husband would react if I told him I wanted to have a baby now.

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  3. Have a great time in Australia ... Home! Don't be too much of as Sneaky Bitch :)

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  4. Totally with you on the lying thing!!

    www.madeintheshadeblog.com

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  5. Haha! Baby fever ain't happening for you! It's funny how blogging is different than meeting people in real life. We social media stalk our favs! Have a great time in Aussie!!

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  6. Bahaha! That sneaky bitch gif is too funny. :) And I totally stalk new bloggy friends. Doesn't everybody?! Haha

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  7. Love today's post! Hope you have tons of fun in Australia!

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  8. Haha you crack me up good and proper, I was having a right old chuckle on the bus while I was reading this, I think the other commuters might think I am crazy...

    P.s. so jealous you are going to Australia, I have to wait a whole five and half months before I get to go back there boohoo. Have fun! x

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  9. Your confessions posts always having me laughing-so-hard-it-hurts kind of laughing. I know if I start out the day reading this, it'll start out good! SO freaking exciting for you leaving tomorrow! Have a safe and amazing trip, lovely!!

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  10. Haha these gids are perfect! I used to get so angry when someone would call my best friend their best friend. I would be like ummmmm WTF, NO!

    I have ZERO tolerance or patience for liars. Why lie?!?!

    I bet you are so excited about your trip you can barely stand it!!! I hope you have a fabulous time pretty lady!

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  11. Ha! I do the same with new blog friends ;)

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  12. That turtle falling off is LoL. And your so funny with the hold on babies!

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  13. catching people in lies is the best. i do it face to face so that i can watch their expressions as they try to find even more excuses it's so awesome. then i laugh and say "whatever!" and leave. best.

    also - your trip!!! jelly that you're going to australia but glad that you can see your familia.

    thanks for linking up!

    -kathy
    Vodka and Soda

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  14. You gifs are 100% my favorite! I love the turtle one and of course, Downton Abbey :)!

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  15. All of my close friends seem to be going through a lot of drama right now. And I am trying really hard to stay supportive, but, at times, that is difficult. {I know I sound like a bad friend, but my drama quotient is just really low}

    Yay for Australia! Hope you have safe & smooth travels!

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  16. Very very funny post today! You have excellent gif finding skills!

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  17. I love these . . . and agree with them all. And nothing tells a story like a well placed gif! Hope you have a safe trip!!

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  18. OMG, that turtle gif, has to be the best thing I've seen in a long time! I don't know why it was so hilarious to me! So excited for your up coming trip! I hope you have safe travels!

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  19. I'm officially hiding out in your luggage... just FYI! So if it feels a little heavier than you remember... it's fine, don't worry about it! ;) And I am so bad about meeting new people. I swear I'm completely socially awkward! LOL!

    <3, Pamela
    sequinsandseabreezes.blogspot.com

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  20. I'm totally guilty of giving an opinion that doesn't match what the asker wanted to hear and then feeling awkward afterwards. Oops. It will teach them to make that mistake with me twice! Happy vacation!

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  21. If my husband came to me and said I want to have a baby first I'd check his temperature then ask him how he's had to drink. Haha basically I would be incredibly shocked if he ever said that to me. Not that he doesn't want to but it's more my decision when. Have fun in Australia!!

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  22. Girl you make me laugh!!! I am the same way about people and their drama - like we are too old for this - why are you complaining about XYZ!? Safe travels tomorrow and hope you have the best time with your friends and family!

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  23. YES! hahaha. Love the exit. Really, love the whole dang thing. Also, I LOVE when people "don't" read your blog but then act all weird when you post something / reference something they would only know from reading your blog / SHOW UP IN YOUR BLOG ANALYTICS. skanks.

    Have a blasty blast in the Land Downundah!

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  24. hahahaha! I think it is a superhero worthy talent when people find the perfect gifs for these posts! Seriously! I can't do it!!! Maybe I need a tumblr... I don't know! You rocked this one!

    -Kate
    www.theflorkens.com

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  25. Bahahahaha! I'm dying! That Corey gif!! I think I would do the same if my husband told me he was ready for a baby!! Omg I can't deal with lying anymore! I use to be the same way like whatever, but now I just want to call their ass out haha! Omg so so so so excited for you!! Can't wait to hear all about your trip!!

    <3 Shannon
    Upbeatsoles.blogspot.com

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  26. HOLLER! Australia!

    I also like to tell people I know they are a lying liar who lies. You can lie to yourself, but you can't lie to me!

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  27. I too, am allergic to bullshit. I call people out so much. I have a really hard time holding back my weird when I meet new people. So I just stopped trying that. It's pretty much I'm going to make a Marvel or Transformers reference - take it or leave it. I will also try & push the book I just read on you. BECAUSE IT IS SO GOOD!

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  28. Hey Kristen!! OMG you had me dying about the best friend thing!! I am the eexact same way!! lol Everything all so true!! I also follow a blogger who I like on eeeverything and comment on most/all their posts lol! And I totally have to try to be normal in front of new people! That 'ish is hard work lol!! Great post girl lol!!

    Lisa,xo
    http://chiclittlethrills.blogspot.com/

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  29. I almost spit my coffee on the turtle pushing the turtle off, so funny. Haha "and that was the end of that convo" Have so much fun on your trip!

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  30. Baaaahahahah those turtles. My god. I love it.
    Also COMPLETELY agree re: the drama. Stop complaining and start doing something to change the situation you claim to hate so much! Or at least stop whining because I cannot stand that shit.
    Annnnnd kick bad people out of your life. There's nothing wrong with that at all. Don't let other people's negativity keep you from being the best you can be.
    Alsooo.... thank you for using 2 JLaw gifs in a row. I love her and I love being bloggy friends with you :)
    Have an amaaaaaaazing time in Australia!! So happy for you to get a trip home with your family! Safe travels xox

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  31. LOVE THIS!!! But I was a little confused what the bad people and blogging part was directed at, haha. Anyway, can't wait for the moment you do break down and decide to have a kiddo! You won't be like most mom's you will be a COOL MOM, haha . Have a REALLY GREAT trip! Aussies are the KINDEST people!

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  32. Okay I think your hump day confessions are my favourite! Um sneaky bitch hat?? Amazing, I love the turtle pushing the other one in the water. I can just hear him saying "oops was that me?". And ya blog friends are so different than real life friends. Blog friends I know everything about them after 15 minutes of online stalking whereas real life friends actually have to tell me what they like to eat or what their boyfriend looks life. Have a safe flight!! Can't wait to see your pictures from Down UNDA :)

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  33. That. Turtle. Clip. I just laughed hysterically! And omg have the BEST TRIP EVER!! xo

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  34. I am so with you on the drama. I have a friend who is SO dramatic and I just want to be like, "bitch, please." But I love her, so I put up with it...The things we do for our friends...

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  35. Haha I feel the same way about the best friend thing, but also about my niece and nephew! I HATE when people say they are their "aunt." I'm like, sorry, you're just not. So quit pretending. I would totally write a post about it, but I think some of the people who call themselves that read my blog :)

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  36. That turtle Gif is the best thing I have seen all day!!!!

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  37. Woop woop to Australia TOMORROW! This is the year of "cutting" - bad friends, bad blog reads, not real friends on Facebook (hate that thing more and more anyways). Onwards and upwards is right, lady! XO

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  38. Have a great, fantastic, wonderful trip :) That turtle gif had be giggling...that poor turtle was just minding his own business getting some sun. Ugh the drama...luckily I'm in a fairly drama free place in life now, or I just got rid of the crazies :) I remember I once told a friend, dump him or don't talk to me about him anymore...he is a piece of shit and always will be, when you realize that I'm here but until then I just can't continue having the same conversation.

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  39. Oh my gif! There were so many - and I love them all. Seriously, gifs make everything better. Austrailia?! Yay! Have so much fun.

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  40. Ha ha, yes, yes, and yes some more! Love this :D

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  41. I have a real life friend who has the same drama ALL THE FREAKING TIME. It's always about men. She always falls instantly in love with some guy she JUST started seeing. They break up. She's devastated because they were MEANT TO BE. Cue next guy...Repeat scenario. Maybe it makes me an awful friend but I just can't deal with hearing it over and over again. We aren't super close like we used to be because of it. She craves drama and I do not.

    I hate liars. In high school there was a girl who lied all the time. She once tried to convince me that her "boyfriend" bought her a ring that was so unique that it just had to be sized in France so that's why I couldn't see it yet. Ya. Ummm. No. She is still friends with some of the people I know. I can't be around her. I honestly believe that she believes her lies. If you're going to lie at least try to make it somewhat believable...geez!

    Yay Australia!!! That's going to be a looong flight but I bet you're so excited you don't even care! We lived in Germany for 3 years and Italy for 2 years. It's HARD being away from your home! I hope you have a great time and get to soak up as much fun as possible =)

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  42. oh my gosh enjoy Australia!!!!!! Also - i am right there with you, I have zero time to listen to your drama that could easily be alleviated, but the person is choosing not to actually deal with it

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  43. I can't tell you how happy I was when I got like a comment on every post I like ever wrote when you found my blog....it made me so giddy ;-) I'm so excited for you!!!!! You are going to have a fabulous time but will definitely cut into our daily email banter but I guess it's a good excuse ;-) xoxoxo

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  44. Confessions is my fave time of the week. I love it. and I start way early. Yea liars suck and once someone lies to me I am officially done with them. Goodbye to them. :D

    Have fun on your trip girl. Safe travels there and back. God bless you.

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  45. You are on HOURS for countdown now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  46. LIARS! Exactly! As soon as someone lies they're out of the inner circle. And I'm not even fake nice anymore. Gurlbye no time for that! It's been working for me since 2nd grade so..

    HAVE FUN IN AUSTRALIA!!!!!!!

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  47. Soooo jealous about Australia!!!! And definitely with you on the best friend thing. Who are they kidding?!

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  48. "'that doesn't sound right, you BIG LYING HOE'" BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Awesome!
    Have so much fun in Australia! I can't wait to hear all about it!!! :D

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  49. I need that Dowager Countess gif to follow me EVERYWHERE. But mostly when I'm talking to my husband.
    YAY Australia!!! Have a great time!!!

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  50. Enjoy your trip!!! Yes, the repetitive drama...I just don't get it because I'm all anti-drama in my life aka no friends except the few that I can put up with, lol. No babies, yeah we're always right and OMG that turtle pushing the other turtle off was the funniest thing I've seen in a while!

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  51. I love this whole post. All. Of. It. I have zero tolerance for lying and if you're a lying liar, our friendship ends immediately.

    Have a wonderful trip!

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  52. Hahaha the turtle gif is my favorite!! I am in no way ready for a baby either! Have a blast in Australia.

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  53. Have a great time in Australia! And oh geez, that turtle gif... it cracked me up way too much! :)

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  54. Lmfao! Talk about extra crazy. I couldn't even see some of the images because my work's firewall deemed them as "pornographic" and "offensive". You totally nailed it. Bwahahahaha. And I totally HATE when people whine about their drama and ask for advice but never do anything about it. Like, bitch I could have been doing something productive with that time I just wasted on you!

    Australia! So jealous!

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  55. LOL! You always find the perfect gifs to express what your saying! I love it! :) HAVE AN AMAZING AND SAFE TRIP!!!!!!!!! CAN"T WAIT TO HEAR ALL ABOUT IT!!!! :) :) :)

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  56. ugh i also do not tolerate liars! too old for that shit now. i basically have the same reaction to any baby talk, but in my head. luckily my SO is on the same page, but his family would probably love it if we were popping them out left and right.

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